5 Key Lessons from The Surrender Experiment

Michael Singer, author of the best-selling books “The Untethered Soul” and “The Surrender Experiment”, has lived one of the most unbelievably interesting and eventful lives that I have ever heard about. The tremendous irony is that that was pretty much the exact opposite of what he actually wanted out of life. In fact, he started out as a young man trying to live much like a devout monk who only sought for spiritual growth and ascension, wanting very little to do with the material pursuits of the external world.

I just finished listening to “The Surrender Experiment” audiobook and have been beyond inspired by the life that this man has apparently lived. What is so exciting is that it gives me a glimpse of what is possible for all of us when we are willing to let go and deeply trust that life is always leading us on a journey to ever grander destinations that support our highest personal and spiritual growth.

Without even meaning to do so, Michael Singer embarked on the journey of a lifetime that brought him to places and situations that he never dreamed he’d be in. And no matter how gloriously positive or dismally hopeless the situation seemed, he never stopped trusting that Life was fully in charge and ultimately leading him to where he needed to be.

For the record, what the author has referred to as ‘Life’ could just as easily be thought of as God, Source, the Universe, Infinite Intelligence, or any other term one might use to conceive of that ultimate Higher Power that is the source of all existence and beingness.

With all of that now said, here are 5 Key Takeaways that I got from listening to “The Surrender Experiment” that I hope will inspire and encourage you in your own life:

1. The ego does not know what is best for us. Michael Singer’s big epiphany that led to his deep spiritual awakening was that there was a voice in his head ceaselessly chattering away at all times, but he noticed that he could simply observe it objectively while seeing himself as separate from it. The whole premise of The Surrender Experiment revolves around the fact that by identifying too strongly with that voice, the voice of the ego, we end up blocking the flow of what Life is always bringing to us.
   
   That voice, with all of its preferences, like and dislikes, thinks it knows how everything works, and what we should be thinking, doing and feeling at any given time. The problem is that it has been heavily conditioned by our past experiences, and all of the societal and familial programming that we were exposed to growing up. That is the reason why following the impulses of the ego often leads to frustration and dissatisfaction for so many of us. The voice of the ego cannot comprehend what possibilities await us when we are willing to open ourselves fully to Life, and trust that it knows what we really need in every moment.
   

2. Life is happening for us, not to us. This is a popular saying that you have probably heard before, but it is beautifully illustrated by the story of Michael Singer’s life. Throughout all of the surprises, twists and turns and ups and downs that life brought his way, he was always willing to surrender and deeply trust that Life was taking him to exactly where he needed to be. The more he adopted that attitude as a way of being, the more Life brought forth the most remarkable and fortuitous circumstances that could have never been orchestrated by conscious effort and willpower alone.
   
   This demonstrates that Life really is always trying to serve our greatest good when we are willing to stop insisting on having everything our way, and resisting what it has in store for us. What Life really has in store for us is far greater than anything we could consciously imagine.
   

3. Letting go is the ultimate path to true freedom and fulfillment. The ego goes to great lengths to protect and preserve our self-concept (all our ideas about who we think we are), and even our attachment to the broader ideas we have about other people and life in general. But it is only by letting go that we surrender to something much greater that wants to be expressed through us.
   
   As discussed in the first point, the ego’s conception of reality is incredibly limited and not able to conceive of the vastness of all possibilities that are available to us. Letting go is how we open ourselves to what is possible, and drop the resistance we hold in an attempt to preserve the small identity of who we believe ourselves to be. There are many reasons why we do this, but ultimately it’s because the enormity of who we really and what is possible for our lives is highly threatening to the ego, which feels safest when the familiar sense of identity is preserved.
   
   Following the flow of Life wherever it leads us can feel very uncertain and overwhelming, but the more we trust and use our own intuition and best discernment to guide us, the more that Life will show us the miraculous ways in which it works on our behalf in every situation.
   

4. We are not in control. There is relatively little that we have control over in this world. Basically, we only have control over how we think and feel, and the decisions that we make. And even that all can be a challenge when we’re being run by subconscious programs that we have never fully been able or willing to face. But from my perspective, there is indeed a Higher Power (what Michael Singer refers to as Life itself) that is handling all the details of everything we could never begin to have control over. The weather, the markets, chance encounters, freak accidents and strokes of apparent luck, etc.
   
   When we realize that all we have control over is our own selves, we are free to stop worrying so much about what is going to happen to us, and to the world at large. We are more free to trust that Life is always working for us, so long as we are doing the best we can to live as the authentic person that we are. If we are focused on becoming a better version of ourselves and pursuing things that are truly meaningful and important to us, then we can leave the rest up to Life. If you read the book, you will see how time and time again Life brought together all of the right people and circumstances that allowed for the next chapter of Michael’s incredible journey of growth and progress to unfold in perfect timing.
   
   There is nothing we need to make happen, all we have to do is remain open to the opportunities that Life is always presenting us with, and act on them to the best of our ability. From experience, I can say that the more we choose to believe that nothing is happening to spite us and that every experience stands to serve us in some way, the more apparent it will become that that is the case.
   

5. Even the most dire situations are an opportunity to become more free. Similar to the other ideas presented here, nothing that is happening in our lives, no matter how seemingly negative or hopeless it appears, is an inherently, objectively bad thing.
   
   In the final chapters of the Surrender Experiment, Michael Singer recounts an incredibly dramatic and frightening situation that arose in his own life that he never dreamed he would be involved in. And rather than let that erode his sanity and peace of mind, he actually saw it as an invitation from Life to let go even more of everything that he deeply feared the most. You can read the book for yourself to find out how it all turned out, but the point is that anything you experience can be a chance to surrender even more fully and watch how amazingly Life unfolds when you place deep trust in the belief that it is all happening to serve you in some important way.
   
   In this way, we aren’t giving external circumstances power over the one and only thing that they don’t have true control over, which is our own internal state of being. In that regard, even the most challenging situation you will ever face could be a chance for you to realize just how much true power you really have to change the course of your own life.

So there are my five biggest takeaways from The Surrender Experiment. I hope something here resonated that you can also take with you! I highly recommend the book if you are interested in an extremely inspiring story that shows the amazing adventure Life can take anyone on when they are willing to surrender, and trust that something greater is guiding them at all times throughout their life. In a world of increasing complexity and uncertainty, it may be the very thing we all need to learn how to do now more than ever.

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- Dan